Part 1: The Drive

Some thoughts about the long haul down here...

Truth be told, the drive was not as bad as I imagined, we actually really enjoyed it! The only bad part was coming in to Mexico City, where we hit an evening traffic jam. Yes, it was stand still traffic-and that is NOT cool after being on the road for almost 12 hours.

We were worried about the dogs and how they would react to the journey. The initial haul to San Antonio was taxing on them...they had never gone for such a long ride! However, after a few days hanging around, they were fine. The stretch to Laredo was better.

The crew.

Sunny, always the oddball, persisted on trying to receive the Oscar for best dramatic lead, and refused to eat unless lying on the bed with his food laid in close proximity.

'Nero' and his meal.

Laredo itself was weird. All they do late at night is drag race, yell and scream and drive loud cars. Oh, and the occasional rampant drug lord shooting spree. Dinner from Denny's, a crap 'salad' with chicken.

Sleep was non-existent. Dasha and Winston slept(?) with me. Every time the clunky old hotel A/C would turn on, Winston would leap out of bed and pace. Since this occurred every 15 minutes or so, you can see how bountiful sleep was. Whenever there was a car door slamming and someone screaming, Dash would sit up and stare at the door. My heart would pound just waiting for splinters to come flying in and sweaty, grimy Mexicans with AK47's to start yelling at us.

It never happened. Thank God! We hit the road at around 7am and started a few blocks down for the border. Yowza! Mexico, here we come!!!!

Early morning, Texas Mexico border. Not too thrilled about this sight-leaving Texas. Already there are huge lines of folks coming to the promised land (and acting as mules laden with dope).

We breezed through the checkpoint. Over the river, at the visa joint, we got to encounter Mexican efficiency first-hand. Fill this out, walk away, go see that guy, get a stamp, go to counter 4, stand around while the workers bump into one another and mill around. I was hungry and tired and ready to get it on, not stand in some bland building and watch workers bounce off one another like cheap bumper cars.

Of course, after we get our 'papers' in order and exit the compound, the first like we stop at, the legless bum peers over the other traffic and immediately hones in on us. As he hobbles over, the light turns green, he sticks his hand out and i speed off. "Sorry dude! I got places to be!!!!"

Straight outta Laredo...

I was maddened by the lack of signage on the highways. You can drive a looooong time before a small sign can be seen with a brief note of what direction whatever town may be. Do not expect to see a countdown of miles as we do at home. You take a wrong turn, well...you can be way outta your league by the time another sign is seen. STAY ON THE TOLL ROADS was the most stressed bit of advice-oh, and DO NOT STOP FOR ANYONE. Oddly enough, several miles through Laredo there is a second check point as you leave the city. We crawled though slowly and nothing happened. I assumed we were cool, and started to accelerate. Immediately doing so, an alarm sounds and a soldier raises his hand. I just knew bullets would come flying from behind. I hit the brakes, dogs and luggage slam forward and cursing emits from Tonya's mouth. I yell back. No bullets were exchanged, but plenty of heated foul-mouth banter was. The guard walks over and asks for papers. he asks what we are hauling. He sees the dogs and asks if we are bring them in to race.
"No"
he then wants to know what else we have. I roll the back windows down a bit, he peers in, Sunny moves forward thinking he made his first international friend, the guard steps back in fear. he kept a few paces back, trying to peer in over the dogs and Tonya re-assured him we were cool...there was no TV or blu ray player or anything of the sort under those blankets...not at all!

Obviously not too interested in getting to close, he hands us back our papers and tells us to beat it. happily, I do.

Sunny.

The scenery started to pick up towards Monterrey. I was told to stay away from this place. Bad news. Drugs, guns, violence a plenty. Plus, they do not like 'chilingas' or those from Mexico City. I was a gringo hauling contra-band.

First sight of the mountains in the distance.

Part of what made the drive surprisingly pleasant, was the scenery. As you approach Monterrey, the mountains start to appear. You get bigger ones as you drive towards Saltillo. All along the way there are endless plains and rolling hills of Joshua trees. I am sure it helped being early morning and quite nice out too. In any case, we were happy to stare out the windows at the scenery, and watch the mountains get bigger as we got closer. The downside is, my plans of filming everything went poopsie about an hour into all this. The old video camera ate the tape. Now I would be forced to take snaps while driving. This was quite a stunt which freaked me out some, and definitely was not seen as daring or cool in the least by Tonya. I am glad I did though...

Lovely...(especially that U2 are nowhere to be found)

All through the journey, they 'guys' (the dogs) were great! Mostly they slept, without any real restlessness. Winston would shake a while and drool, then lay down. The slightest loud talk and quick jerk of the car (usually me, running off the road trying to snap a pic) would make him jump up and start quivering and panting again.

The up and down of the mountains was nice. I thought it would suck doing the journey at night. Not only a lack of signs, but NO lights along the way. Some of the cliffs and drops would be painful if you tried them out.

Cuttin' through somewhere around Saltillo.

We had a few stops along the way to switch drivers, do a pee pee and managed to fuel up and grab a 'Sandway' and some roadside eatery. Yes, Sandway-not Subway. Still, the hot ham sandwich with jalapenos and mustard was ok...far better than the snack food we were existing on so far. The dogs loved getting out for a stretch too.

We eat-they eat.

I was told plenty horror stories of bandits and drug-crazed Mexicans out to high-jack your stuff. I was also warned if the men in black and machine guns wave you to halt, do so-or else. It is true that Mexico is doing their best to stop the drug mess. I did see a convoy of these men in black. Traveling in a convoy of three (just as the tales are told), machine guns mounted in back of their trucks, full bullet proof gear and faces hid under black masks. Luckily though, I was going the opposite way...and I do not mess with drugs. Why should I care????

The scenery alternated between fields of Joshua trees, open roads and po-dunk villages. Tempting as it was to stop and have a looksie, eating was out fo the question. Big fear #1 : diarrhea on the road in a strange land. Not cool. So, a view from the windows was good enough. However, I know there is some amazing food out there somewhere!

Hmmm...

...beer-thirty, maybe?....

The strange thing was while driving, we would hear loud SPLATS and gunk would be all over the window. the wipers would be enlisted to clean through the goo, doing only a half-assed job. This would happen every so often. After one particular shower of goo against the windshield, we finally discovered what the translucent sticky stuff was. "Bees!" Tonya yelled, as she ponted to the wipers. There were a load of bee bodies laying atop of both wipers. I never knew they had no color to their guts, or that their insides were so gelatinous.

Casualties on the wiper blades.

yuck

The hours wound down, our butts grew more sore and our stomachs rumbled more. The dogs started to get way 'over it', yet just laid there, patiently awaiting the final stop. As we neared the city and hit traffic, every few few of stop and go would make them get excited, thinking the long haul was over. We still had a few hours of this mess until we arrived 'home'.

We made it in about 12 hours or so. Stops along the way...traffic, not too bad. We stopped in a local grocery store and grabbed necessities for the next day. Grabbed some hot food for dinner and made our way home.

Once here, we sat dazed and ate. Didn't say much, but it was nice to be still and to finally be done with it. I was thankful. the car held out, the dogs were great and no hassles along the way. I was actually starting to feel fortunate to be able to have made that drive and see as much of the country as we did. I would do it again! I am not sure why the iPod played so much Depeche Mode though...it was not suiting.

Yours truly, the morning after, fighting fit!