Part 10: Una Noche Con Brian Eno

It really came as a surprise. While driving to the grocery store one day an ad came on the radio about Brian Eno. I have no idea what was being said, just a bunch of blabber until the name BRIAN ENO blahblahblah. I turned the volume up and thought by not talking and letting the ad play I would get to understand what was being said. I kept quiet and pointed to the radio. Tonya just kept orbiting in her other world.

“Hey!” I said, getting her attention. She looked at me and I made another gesture to the radio, “What’s that? What are they saying”? Tonya stared at the dash, still not getting what all this was about. The commercial was over and I asked her again, “What did they say?”

“About what?” she said looking at me with an empty glare.

“About Brian Eno!” I said in a disgusted huff.

“What about Brian Eno?” she asks back, like I was out of my mind asking her what the radio was saying about Eno.

“The ad! What did the ad just say about Eno. The ad that was playing on the radio!”

“What ad about Eno? I wasn’t listening” she said as a matter of fact. I could not believe it. I turned the volume up, stay silent and nudge her and point to the radio and my ear, signing for her to listen. To her, this must have all seem like I was having some sort of spazz, because it obviously did not register. In one ear and out the other, the image into her eyes but lost somewhere before it could register with conclusion department of her brain.

That was it. What brief bit about Eno there was on Mexican airwaves was now lost for good.

A couple of weeks later, another ad came on about Eno. This time I made sure I said plain and very loud, ‘LISTEN TO THIS COMMERCIAL AND TELL ME WHAT THEY SAID’. Again, she gets none of it but simply the call numbers of the station. Good enough, at least with that I can put my sleuth hat on and get to work.

I type up the radio station and see nothing about Eno. I search the site, and on one guy’s blog, there is an ad “Una Noche Con Brian Eno”. I get excited and call Tonya over and have her read it. Rather than read the whole thing and break it down, she reads word for word…I have no patience. However, there is a note that says the station is giving away a pair of tickets to the Eno event. The catch is, you have to photograph your records and send it in. The one with the most Eno, gets the free tickets.

I have yet to unpack my records, and I am not going to go do it just to snap a picture of my Eno collection. What kind of idiot does that? I did, however, manage to snap a photo of a peculiar sign while walking through the market about a week earlier. I sent the image along for the contest anyway, explaining my circumstances and that this photo must account for something! I was fretting. The event was in two days. On originality alone, I was convinced the reply would come that I won. It never did. I was in denial, just thinking this was typical Mexican take your time type stuff. I checked the radio website a couple of times a day to see if there was anything there. It never showed. I was a loser. They obviously did not appreciate the humor of the photo. Tonya said we would go anyway, to not worry.

The day of the show was grey. It had cooled down, and been raining. It was London weather! Tonya was sidetracked by typical daily ‘issues’ and occurrences. I was watching the hours drip by and by 1 in the afternoon; I knew it was not going to happen. We still had not gone to get the tickets, and we had to be home by 3 for the workers. Tonya was shuffling around, obviously trying every bit of body language she knew, to get the message across that she could care less about trudging to get tickets and listen to a bald-headed freak talk about art and wank. I was somewhat disappointed, but told her if she was not up to it, I would sacrifice. We could go for a nice walk around and just take it easy. She reluctantly admitted to her lack of interest in watching Eno speak, and we decided to go out and explore instead.

It was a great choice. We walked all over the place. She showed me a nice park and some interesting neighborhoods. We watched a kid skateboard on a national monument (the very same monument which at one time housed Obregon’s actual hand!!!!) I had been told about the hand, but recently Tonya found out that the original decaying hand in formaldehyde had been replaced with a fake wooden thing. Who cares about that! We snooped around a few restaurants that looked mighty tasty, and by the crowds inside, they have to be! We hung out in a bookstore and browsed through all sorts of books and balked at their prices (too bad there is no half.com here!).

In the park

kids sleeping in the road

looking down a street and seeing mountains!

The weather was perfect for a lazy stroll without any direction. We wandered back stopping at will, checking out small shops and other places we had seen but never knew what they were. Tonya mentioned that we needed some stuff from the market, so we made our way in the general direction. As we were nearing one of the many entrances of the market, I happened to see a DVD laid out on a wobbly table on the side of the building as we walked by. It was Russell Crowe. I mean, it was Russell Crowe as Robin Hood! How on earth can this be out on DVD here when it is actually showing across the street in the theater? We have been saying we were going to see this. A kid with loads of hair gel in his hair his hustling and bustling and laying out these DVDs with great speed. A woman grabs a handful and pays the kid. As he takes the money, he tells us the price. I watch him kiss the money with some sort of sign of the cross thing. He did this at least 6 or 7 times. I assume the lady tipped him well or something.

Little did I know I was face to face with a Mexican pirate! His booty was a slew of theatrical releases that he had packaged and was starting to spread out on this makeshift display table. The price was right, 4 films for 50 pesos. (That is about $3.75 to you and me). Tonya and I looked at the titles as they were being put out and we were shocked, “Is this the new Robin Hood” she asked the boy?

“Si” the hair gel said.

“Is it good quality?” Tonya asks. The lady who just gave the kid enough money to make him do the sign of the cross and kiss the dough repeatedly butts in and says that the quality is so good that she scouts for the kid constantly. She reassures us that we will not be disappointed.

“It’s cheaper than renting a movie at Blockbuster” I said while browsing the titles. It only takes a split second to grab up 4 films we want to see. I hand them to the kid and he yells at another pirate who comes from behind a car. The other pirate bags up our four films and I look at the main pirate and ask in straight English, “You sure these are good quality?” He shakes his glistening head and says sternly “Si!” The goods are handed to me and Tonya and I walk away. We are all giddy. You would think we juts made some historical heist by the way we were giggling and talking up our takings.

We are about halfway home when all of a sudden I stop and look at Tonya, “Wait! Are there even in English?” In our excitement we did not even stop to ask if these bootlegged gems were the real deal or some sort or Mexican modified thing. Tonya looked at me and said somewhat remorsefully, “Oh well. It is too late now.” We both decided to keep onwards and we would check it out when we got home.

As soon as we did arrive, I went straight to the DVD player and popped in Robin Hood. I watched with anticipation as the screen started to light up. I could not tell what exactly I was seeing, as it was a bit blurry and then came in to focus. Whatever it was I watching, it was crooked. Whoever made this copy was filming this in the theater and had forgotten to straighten their camera. I laughed out loud and called to Tonya to tell her of our newly acquired blockbuster. We both agreed, what do you want for buying on the street and for so cheap? It was still going to be our night’s entertainment, so we were cool with that. Tonya and I sat and had a coffee and she said she would get started with making dinner after we finished.

All of a sudden the lights went out. Great. Not again. Here we sat sipping on our coffee and tea, and the lights go out. We exchange the same thoughts, that this will not last long. Most importantly, we laughed at how this was going to interrupt our big movie blockbuster night we were hoping for. The power is still out when Tonya is ready to cook. The darkness is beginning to dissuade her, but a few candles help re-kindle the desire (somewhat). We light up some candles and place them in the kitchen and dining room so we can see what is going on. The darkness made itself right at home. It was now sitting still for over an hour. It had also brought a friend, as it was now raining and thundering outside.

making dinner by candle light

pirate confessions soon to follow...

Tonya and Maria Antonia stood in the kitchen and talked while cooking. It was kind of cozy, seeing them stand there at the stove and cook by candle light. As Tonya was stirring the soup, she looked at Maria and me and said, “This is payback”. We did not know what she meant. “This is all because we bought pirated goods. We are sitting in the dark as a penalty for buying those DVDs” she said with complete conviction. I laugh and dismiss the superstition with a simple statement of fact, “No it isn’t. This is Mexico!” Maria Antonia got a good chuckle out of that one. We talked about the frequent anti-piracy ads on all the DVDs here. As we stood and laughed about Tonya’s statement, Maria Antonia confessed that she frequently buys pirated goods. Sometimes you even get ones where people are talking throughout the film, or you keep hearing laughter from the audience. These simple truths made us all bust out with laughter. I began to hope that we may have been just lucky enough to have acquired one such specimen. In any case, it really didn’t matter. Here we stood in a dark kitchen, no power to be had, and discussed the pros and cons of buying on the black market. This could be a ‘teachable moment’ (to quote a modern day American pirate), that you really do get what you pay for! As it was shaping up, we just spent $3.75 and were not even going to be able to watch our films!

close up of my Aerosmith magnet on the oven.

Three hours had passed and the lights finally came back on. The glory lasted only 10 minutes before we were left in darkness again. A short while later, light surged into the living room. We cheered at the simple act. As the excitement died down, Tonya looked at us and said that now she was ‘over it’ and could not be bothered to watch a film now. It was too late to get started. After all of this and dissing Brian Eno we are now ready to enjoy our night’s entertainment, a few episodes back to back of “Forensic Files”. To think I had willingly passed on Eno to eat in the dark and then sit in the cool rainy breeze and watch Forensic Files while my girlfriend falls asleep on the couch. I think 10cc foreshadowed this with that little ditty, “the things we do for love…”.